Quick catch up with Aspie teen

Hello again, stranger!
Haven't wandered through this landscape for a minute or 3....but have been thinking of it and you.
There has been ups and the usual downs with horrid not-so-little thugs at school making the Feral Aspie teen feel as dreadful as themselves.
With their fists and feet and name calling.
*sigh*

There were a few explody moments at home that were curtailed with great finesse and elan by yours truly.
Yes, I do fashionable interventions.
Apparently.

Much time at Dunolly of late has soothed the anxiety, brought the irritations down a few notches and slipped this thing called Life into first gear to tackle the hills.
Dunolly is filled with eccentric characters (in suburbia they'd be called weird) and there is no pressure to conform to an expected "norm" as defined by "The Beautiful People".

The Aspie teen will be warbling his bass in the Gilbert & Sullivan production of Trial by Jury - in both the celebration of the refurbished heritage-listed Court House and at the Festival in October - as well as lending a hand to renovate/complete the gorgeously splendid old Junction Hotel (with Ballroom, thankyouverymuch!).
And he'll be on hand during the weekend of the open house of said Junction Hotel (with Ballroom, thankyouverymuch!).
I may be roped into plonking my arse on an upstairs chair, in Victorian dress, to crochet and keep an eye on people wandering through (possibly the Ballroom, thankyouverymuch!).

The Feral One is happy to continue seeing his psychologist via the school; he has a great rapport with him and finds him easy to natter away with.
Something that has been worrying him is the possibility he may have Bi Polar/Personality Disorder like his older sibling, so he discussed it with the psychologist and may be assessed for it at some date in the near future.
I don't think he fits the criteria but it's a worry he has and it needs to be addressed - he has seen the mess an out of control, unmedicated person with it can experience and has a fear he may develop it as he matures.
If an assessment gives him the relief and removes all question, then it's well worth it.
IF, on the other hand, it proves he does have it then we can tackle the bumps with a better understanding and forewarning we didn't have with our other child.
Plus, the Feral Aspie is also fully aware of the need for therapy and medication, something we fruitlessly fought to achieve for his sibling.
Yes, I'm looking for silver linings just in case.

I iz a'scared

I'm drowning.
There is so much ready to pounce on us in the coming months it feels like everything is LOOMING over us like a teetering tower of monster blocks about to splat us under the weight.

Return to school, return to the Risperdone, Feral Aspie having anxiety attacks at Every.Little.Thing in his daily routine including using public transport and snapping his Myki card in half yet again - those suckers cost $10 a pop to replace, we've replaced 2 so far with a 3rd on the horizon cos Metcards are being phased out.
*sigh*
Return to Feral Aspie being bullied,  misunderstanding others' social meanings,  not hearing/processing what is said to him, getting hold of the wrong end of the stick and/or missing complete instructions from teachers.
He gets a free netbook through the school this year - I am FREAKING that he'll vague out and leave it on the bus, drop it, put it down to tie his shoelaces then walk off without it, play rugby with it (don't laugh, he played rugby while his broken arm was in a cast. And wondered why it hurt even more.It may have been the reason he had to have surgery to straighten the break.).

He turns 16 at the end of this year, which means we have to apply for adult carers allowance for him, which means we have to fill in a forest of paperwork and jump through hoops.
And plus HE'S TURNING 16.
Sixteen....SIXTEEN.
He already thinks he knows everything (yes, he does, if we're cataloguing dinosaurs, transformers, Hot Wheels cars, the family of arachnids and Minecraft).

Now there's news articles detailing how those with high functioning autism will lose their diagnosis, how Aspergers will disappear into being lumped into the autism umbrella, the scare-mongering is running rife.
In the long run there's going to be an ugly transition period where parents are going to have to fight to retain their kids original diagnosis, if only to claw back the measly few pennies they are granted to 'assist' with their child's disability.
Cos the freaking label might suddenly disappear like smoke when this new book gets published but the freaking disability doesn't.

I.Am.Drowning in a sea of anxiety, worry, panic attacks and all I can see when I try to look forward is a swirling black mess.

Let's talk about suicide

The current, long-standing argument is that we and the media shouldn't discuss it/gloss over it lest articles glamorise the act of suicide and encourages others to follow suit.
Well, guess what?
This whole not talking about it thing?
It's not working.

Both my eldest and Feral Aspie teen have depression amongst other issues and both have attempted suicide, multiple times with Feral Aspie teen, still ongoing.

We talk openly about suicide at home and how it is the need to end something in a persons life - be it an emotion, a habit, a group of friends, bullying - but actually ending the life itself is not the answer.

Did you know suicide is the leading cause of death in our youth second only to car accidents?
And how many of those car 'accidents' aren't accidents?
Which leads to asking...how many farm 'accidents' aren't accidents?
How many 'accidental over doses' aren't accidental?
How many pedestrian accidents aren't 'accidents'?
The list goes on.

Our bright young children, our future, the next generation - these are our beloved babies, those little beings we guided to adolescence with their knee scrapes, birthdays, school reports and everything in between.

And they are killing themselves.

Not talking about it hasn't stemmed the suicide numbers.
How about we try openly discussing suicide to explain that it isn't the answer to every miserable feeling, it won't cure lovesickness, that it won't change the world... that the only thing it will achieve will be to snuff out their future chances of being on top of the world...and crush those who love them.

Aspie futures

Here we are December already and Xmas rat-a-tat-tatting on the door.
Yes, the shopping is done.
I think.
Hubby did the Chrissy tree and decs while I had the Feral Aspie teen up in Dunolly.
He got his happy on....he trundled about on his treadly, we sang in the choir for the Chrissy carols and he et a delish chicken parma in The Royal Hotel ( cooked by Mine Host, Karen The Kitchen Whizz).

He's been so full of emotions these past few weeks - end of the year irritation picked up from the other kids at school, excitement at school hols, excitement at staying in Dunolly, birthday excitement (he's a whole 15 now, where the hell did those years go??!!) and so on and so forth.
You get the picture - typical Aspie and typical teen coping with all these GINORMOUS churning emotions inside.
But he's been a good kid.
Got his happy on cos of Dunolly.
And wants to get a part-time job.....

But.
We are starting to get scared for his future.
Like any parents we want to see him independent, doing whatever job/work career that floats his boat and coping with Life.
But.
With his Auditory Sensory issues we can't see him coping with even a part-time job after school...he barely takes in the instructions of school lessons or conversations with friends, how much basic Occ Health and Safety will he retain?
He works at a s-l-o-w pace, hurrying him up Does.Not.Work, it only angers him...how many bosses will tolerate a time-poor employee (who has NO concept of time itself) with what they perceive as "attitude" before booting him out?
How many knocks to his self-esteem will he have to cop before something, anything, turns up?

We've even tossed around the mad idea of starting a business in Dunolly just so he could work at his own pace, learn basic safety proceedures at his own pace, work without a boss hanging over his shoulder or the stress and pressure of keeping up.
How to start a business - what business?! - we have not the foggiest.
This would, of course, involve selling my Dad's house and using that money as we are stoney broke and on pensions.
How would we do this with my vision impairment, hubby's dyslexia and lack of car transportation I have NFI.
It seems like an impossibility but there must be a way or something for him.

Hmm, something for researching in the New Year.
Maybe.

Victorian Police get my vote

In light of the recent criticisms of the Victorian Police for their lack of training in dealing with mentally ill people I felt they got a bit of a raw deal.

The many times we have had to call them out to assist with Feral Aspie they have been absolutely superb with immediate help, suggestions, calls to specialsts and hospitals; there was only 1 individual I disagreed with (and followed it up with a phone call to her the next day, sorted it because she was willing to listen) but that was through the misunderstanding Autism/Aspergers/ABI brings with the fluctuating behaviours not fitting into a strict mental health mould.

How often do you think the police escort a person to the nearest public hospital emergency room to get treatment for suicidal/unacceptable behaviours only to watch the person refuse admission/get told to see their private doctor/come back when there's an R in the month and waltz back onto the street - still in an unstable mental status - while the police are still filling in the paperwork for the call-out in the first place?
It happens very, very often.....

The system is not rigged to work for mental health patients; it is for regular, garden variety illnesses and, over the years, the mental health system (with patients, staff and differing problems/laws galore) has been forced to fit in alongside the over-stretched general health model, and now most times inside the over-stretched general health hospitals seeing as public specialist mental health hospitals got flogged off to the highest bidder *ahem*

And, let's be honest here, folks, it's not like the police are likely to be called to attend an afternoon soiree with a mentally ill person, to pass buttered finger buns and sip tea from bone china cups.
No, they usually get called out to help someone who has been let down by the garden variety health system; someone in mental distress who has become out of control for one reason or another.

This is what they are confronted with - the end result of a broken system.
I know I certainly couldn't do their job.
Could you?

Invisible disabilities

I'm tired of people dismissing the 'hidden' disabilities.
I don't mean just those who don't realise a disability is present, I'm talking about those Joe Blows on the street who think they have the right to query a diagnosis.
Because, dontchaknow, they've scrubbed public toilets for years (and sandblasted god-knows-what off the toilet seats) and they KNOW about medical stuffs!

My darling Feral Aspie already has depression, on top of his other 'invisible' disabilities like autism, Aspergers, Tourettes, ADHD, OCD, anxiety, etc, without stupid strangers making him feel responsible for  his behaviours.
We often get ignorant comments like "He doesn't seem that autistic," or "He seems fine to me,"  and even "Are you sure?".
So many times I've wanted to retort,
"Y'know,  we're not sure. We have no fecking idea cos you know how all those medical specialists are, just making stuff up off the top of their heads like that every day,"
*insert wild eyeball rolling and disgusted throat noises*

And the same goes for mental illnesses.
I've had the comment of "You seem too happy to be depressed."
I've wondered if they were waiting for me to open a vein for their entertainment...you know,
"Pass the hors d' oeuvres, there'll be a blood splatter pattern on the carpet any minute..."

I've nursed hospitalised teens in the grip of a drug-induced psychosis' where parents continued to supply them with illegal drugs because "He doesn't seem that bad,".
"No, that's due to the fact he's in a freakin' hospital, under medical care where we don't administer the illegal drugs that caused the problem in the first freakin' place..."

It's one thing for a schizophrenic to feel better once medicated then think they're 'cured' and no longer need medication but when idiots question the illness they compound the pressure that person is under and, subtly, infer that the person is a liar.
One gorgeous gal I nursed was often questioned about her schizophrenia by strangers and even family members, with her parents refusing to believe she had a mental illness because,
"Who else is going to look after us in our old age?"
30 years after her initial diagnosis her tea-total father claimed it was the single snifter of sherry she had after tea each night that caused her 'problems'.
Who knew sherry was so evil?!

We need to stop this immediate distrust when someone confides their diagnosis and accept it.
Hopefully the International Day of People with a Disability will get through to some people and stop this discrimination.
Check out Rudely Interrupted, the rock band headlining Queabeyan's Festival of Ability on December 1.
Festival of Ability.

Things I know

Today is Sans Pants & Bra Saturday!!
Which I shamelessy pinched from both Kelley and Shae.
Following on from Sans Pants & Bra Friday Evening.
Woop, woop.
Yeah, yeah, I know, I know TMI.
Get over it, I did *snort*

The Feral Aspie is distracting himself from the thunder - which isn't actually thunder but the construction of another multi-storey apartment building nearby but sounds like some Greek Goddess is chucking a tanty over the top of the house  - and is relaxing by blowing up zombies and skeletons.
Apologies to the Accidental Insect Pornographer, Kim, despite your high Klout level in Zombies when the zombie apocolypse starts I'll be hiding behind him!



The things I know are that my gorgeous boy is needing time out from mainstream school and this toenail was a blessing.
That I hesitated signing off to not register to homeschool again next year (you have to register each year in Victoria).
That maybe I'll register again just in case and look to part-time homeschooling/mainstream schooling for taking the pressure off.
That things got so bad a few weeks back that my beautiful, clever Aspie told me he was considering suicide.
And that he'd thought of different ways to do it.
That I watch him like a hawk, surreptitiously, and worry each time he walks out the door to go to school.
That the TV show Glee the other night proved my point when Santana was called out on her bullying, that she was feeling so miserable inside and was trying to make others feel the same misery.
That there is a horrible epidemic amongst our gorgeous kids that are making them so angry and unfullfilled with themselves that they are destroying each other just to survive.
That the mental health system sucks hairy dogs' balls.
That I have my splendid, happy boy right at this moment in time and that makes everything right in the world.

Barefoot Beastie

I have the Feral Aspie teen at home for a few days as he has had part of his toenail permanently removed by a scalpel-wielding GP.
Thank Gawd!!!
Him being grumpy and irritable snapping "I dunno" when asked what the problem is makes for egg-shell walking at home.
Because he doesn't connect the pain in his foot with his irritable mood, being completely at odds with his emotions.

It's given him some breathing space from school, too, where he can relax and unwind, getting his head into a happier headspace before going back and managing the exams.
Which are causing all kinds of anxiety, no matter how much we reassure him.

I'm thinking the half-days he used to have as a youngster at primary school might be on our horizon, again.
With the increased heat, longer days and general angst with end of year exams, etc, I can see us bringing home a lot of his schoolwork to tackle it at home in the afternoons.
I may need to chat to the principal about part-time school and part-time homeschooling, to give Feral Aspie Beastie some time out and an escape from the bullies.
We'll see!

Some of The Secret Language explained

Ahhhh.
That's the sound of a deep, contented sigh.
My darling Feral Aspie geeky teen is getting some help through the school and is happy to discuss his issues.
Well, they are other kids' issues who have seen fit to make them Feral Aspie teen's issues but they are being dealt with.

We've done the usual "ignore them/ walk away/ don't speak back to them" speech for years.
And it is so much easier to say when you're not the person dealing with the angst, anxiety and fury at being the centre of someone else's bullying.
So, after another incident I sat him down and explained about "the secret language".

This is something you and I  (and probably the Man in the Moon) know about instinctively.
But teens (mostly of the male variety) and those with difficulties reading social behaviours don't 'get it'.

I explained that someone teasing/bullying him is handing power over themselves to the victim.
When the victim ignores them, the bully ends up with egg on their face, looking like an idiot in front of friends.
And no feedback from the victim to continue the teasing.

But the moment the victim responds to the bullying they are handing the power back to the bully, feeding the monster with attention and giving them ammunition to continue.

When an older student gave them a mouthful of abuse as he walked past the other day, Feral teen and a friend automatically responded in kind.
In hindsight he understood how this inflamed the situation into shocking volumes.
I explained him to think of the Mountain Gorilla, sitting up banging his chest and grunting out a challenge to other males.
This is how this student (and most male teens) behave.
The moment people respond in kind it is the equivilent of the second male gorilla meeting the challenge and agreeing to a physical fight.

Feral Aspie teen understood immediately when I put "the secret language" into similies that he knew.
And, I think, he is finally understanding the intelligence behind the oft-repeated "ignore them/walk away" instructions as not a means to let the bully off but to keep the power in his own hands (and himself safe).


And now he's off at the GP getting his ingrown toenail - also known as the underlying bane of our existence - seen to.

So, I shall be waving my not-so-magic wand and disappearing myself into the backyard!

Don't ever let yourself get painted beige by bullies

Good grief, I turn around and another month flies past without me posting over here!
To be honest, we've had some great ups and some very dark downs with the Feral Aspie teen.

He loves school, wants to go all the time and really puts his all into his work.
The teachers have no complaints with him and he gets along really well with those in Years 10, 11 and 12.
If he could go to school and just learn, everything would be prefect.

Unfortunately there is a plethora of personalities and types at school; some of them are so uncomfortable in their own skin and have no confidence to let their spirits soar and shine that they bully others who are anything other than average.
You know, paint yourself beige to blend in and don't be too clever or too knowledgable or achieve good marks or do anything that might make you stand out.

So, couple this with Feral Aspie teen who is a walking, talking encyclopedia, who has completed 5 university units and, while he forgets to use shampoo on his hair whilst under the shower, he can recall Every.Little.Detail about arguments/discussions/lessons/events/docos so much so that he spits them back out verbatim.

Which doesn't help him paint himself beige.
And nor does he want to become beige.
He is who he is; his spirit will soar and shine and he will achieve whatever he hell he wants, despite the measly little creatures who have anchored their souls to the floor of the budgie cage and are too scared to unchain their potential to fly free.

Of course, we have glorious, wonderful Dunolly to restore his happy.
We now own a caravan at the caravan park, a little home away from home which Feral Aspie teen finds is just perfect for him.
Instead of him going on the school camp where he won't get a break for 5 days from any niggles or bullying or even mild, joking teasing (which could easily turn into a fully flamed argument) we've offered to take him to spend that week at Dunolly.
Which he jumped at, of course.

Go read a great post on the troubles with bullies by Madam Bipolar.
Yes, bullying has been around for a long time and only recently have schools really started to take it seriously because of the long-term consequences....except those very same long-term consequences were there all along.
We look towards the future of our fragile youth who are bullied but don't forget to take a peep back over our shoulders at those who are still struggling with those consequences.

World Autism Awareness Day in Melbourne 2011

So.
I'm sitting here after the march organised by Autism Victoria to celebrate and highlight World Autism Awareness Day, happy that the meds have kicked in for the back pain (kicking myself for not remembering to take extras for the march but I survived and made it to the end) and thinking back over this marvellous day there are a few things that spring to mind.
1. Autism Victoria do a fucking great job.
2.Thank you to the police who were out in force making sure we all crossed the roads safely (and who even tied a balloon to their car aerial).
3. There were a shedload more people this year than last - easily 2 or three times as many - which added to everyone's feeling of camaraderie, smiles all around, strangers talking openly with each other like long lost friends, a real communal feeling of pride in the support of numbers.
4.Well done and a big pat on the back to Beachcomber Cafe for sponsoring the sausage sizzle.

The Autism Awareness Day march is not like the usual street march...it is nothing like a protest rally - there is no yelling or chanting - nor is it like the ANZAC Day march - there are no pipe/brass bands, no banners, no aeroplane fly overs...it is an oh-so-quiet walk of families simply chatting to each other, holding multicoloured biodegradable helium balloons on biodegradable strings enjoying the walk that is a grass roots almost-silent support of each other on a path many would turn tail and run from if they ever had a choice.
We stood shoulder to shoulder, listened and applauded the speakers , both political animals and those of the norm, then we got the count down for the magical moment; to release our balloons en masse.

Released!

Going...

Going....

Almost gone...

Do YOU socialise with 1000+ of your peers 5 days per week? Then you're just not socialising enough!

Right, you lot!
You, you and you - up the back, hiding behind the lamp post, chewing on your hair - you're all to come up here and give a public speech about how you all socialise with 1000+ of your peers every single day.

*waiting....waiting...waiting...*

Come on now, surely you've been to school?
Surely you've been taught 'the proper way' to socialise with gazillions of total strangers you have nothing in common with and been taught to enjoy your discomfort even when most of them farted the alphabet in science class after egg sangas at lunch?
And, surely to goodness, you're continuing this tradition now that you're all growed up and socialised proper?
(the socialisation, not farting the alphabet around the water cooler to impress that weird work experience chick from accounting)
*rolls eyes*

No?!
What do you mean you "don't associate with that many people even at work" ????
Is this some kind of madness?
You've been to school, that's where you learn to socialise!
Maybe you didn't learn properly?!

*rolls eyes again*

I have been told that to ensure correct socialisation (which is apparently the cause of a teenager hearing voices and hurting himself) the answer is to send an anxiety-ridden, mentally unwell child back to an over-crowded secondary school.
Because, apparently, belonging to 4 different sporting clubs, a drama club, lapidary club, a social group with a social worker and psychologist on hand, not to forget having frequent excursions...none of these count.

 *rolls eyes wildly until they fall out of head*

Plonk

Got to love those who are so rigid in their beliefs that homeschooled kids
A) don't get taught anything
B) have no socialisation
and repeat ad infinitum only what they know - that 'normal' schools are the only way to educate and teach kids to be social.

*rolls pre-plonked eyeballs wildly across bench top in attempt to be sarcastic*

*avoids teabags on bench cos those sting eyeballs like a mofo*

Cos, goodness knows, we all spend about 8-10 hours each day with over 1000 people, behaving in a socially acceptable manner at all times, never wishing to have time to ourselves and, because we are all Borgs/replicas none of us ever feel anxious/nervous/claustrophobic or stressed at sharing so much of our lives with these strangers we have little in common with.
Don't we...?

*No eyeballs were hurt in the making of this dribble*

Last Saturday at Ausblogcon I unexpectantly had lunch with two top chicks....

...the authors of The Australian Autism Handbook.
Click HERE to have a listen to their conversation (from 2008) with Richard Fidler.

There I was, noming the delish food during the conference lunchbreak when this lovely lady said ,
"I think you should be sitting here with us,"
So, being the obedient little soul that I am (shut up) I trotted over and fell into a fabulous conversation with ( or more listened to) these ladies.

Seana Smith is gregarious, witty and generous with her knowledge while Benison O'Reilly is a tad quieter but equally witty and shares another quality with her co-author ; neither of them pull any punches when it comes to discussing ASD.

After we realised we all had a child on the Spectrum we compared notes on age of diagnosis, different state regulations and funding, rates of progress and how there wasn't a lot of home grown literature for parenting ASD teens or social groups.

We discussed the various bits and bobs of growing/maturing kids on the Spectrum; they shared how some families are negotiating the mine field that is Sex! Raging Hormones! Mood Swings! Obsessions! and all the other usual suspects any teen suddenly discovers in those crucial years but which present a whole different box of dice when it comes to keeping ASD teens safe and on the right side of the law.

We talked, laughed, shared tales, laughed at stuff only parents of ASD kids can find funny and generally passed a lovely time together.

We swapped blog addys and I recommended some blogs to them, particularly Magneto Bold Too then we parted company back to the conference but it was one of the most pleasant unexpected luncheon dates I've ever had!

Digging diligently at Dunolly....

.... is my Aspie teen's idea of heaven.

Dunolly has this magical ability to settle a cloak of calmness all about Aspie teen's shoulders the moment we step off the bus into the main street Broadway.

Unfortunately we haven't had a chance to shift our carcasses up there since December...or was it January?
I can't remember, too much crap in between drinks and between my ears since then.

This distance ed lark has whiskers on it with the extra pressure and anxiety caused by deadlines and constant phone calls from teachers; the whole idea was for him to have to answer to someone other than his Mama as educator but all it's done is given him a shedload more issues.
Today he rocked himself to sleep on the couch after fretting about schoolwork - yet again.
So, I'm pulling the pin.

We're taking tomorrow off, playing hookey, going on a homeschooling excursion of our choice, wandering off into the wide blue yonder; we'll probably park our carcasses at the museum to drink in the peace and soul-restoring tranquility of the fossils.
Yes, dead stuff is good.
It doesn't generally talk back.

I'd rather he was in the chook house than up the tree

 I'd rather he was in the chook house than up the tree

Yes, I really did utter that statement to Hubby last Saturday.
We looked at each other and snorted  as we realised how bizarre it would sound to most people.
Well, he did the eye rolling/head shaking thing while I snorted enough for both of us.
Cos our son was in the chook house hiding from the police.
Again.
As you do.

The chooks were a tad put out but I'm sure, given time, they would have learnt to share the space.
Perhaps.
That's if the Aspie child hadn't tried to convince them to stand in front of him and hide him...Trinian and Latte apparently didn't get the memo on team playing and supporting the hand that feeds you so they galloped out of there, leaving him under the eyes of two lovely police people.

Then we did the usual merry-go-round dance of going to the children's via ambulance where more wonderful people bent over backwards to help.
Scary thing is we're starting to recognise the doctors and nurses who are starting to recognise us.
Next thing you know we'll be exchanging Chrissy pressies, inviting each other over for BBQs, calling each other BFF and swapping clothes....
No, wait!
Seriously.
I'd marry the gal who shared my shoe size only for the fact I'd never have to tackle the sales assistant for the Very.Last.Ever ladies size in Omgyourfeetarehumongouslady!
But, I digress...

So, after a gazillion appointments this week with a squillion more to come before TGI Friday kicks in, Aspie offspring is on new meds which appear to be helping (and, judging by his improved lap times, are probably a banned sports enhacing substance but, shhhh, we won't mention it to the swim coach).
Had a MILD moment this afternoon where he simply ran outside.
So I left him to it (after ascertaining he wasn't going to do anything silly).
Then we heard noises so we checked.
He was cleaning the spouting on the shed.
He keeps this up I'll hire him out...

....The grass is as high as an elephant's eye....how's the humidity....?

Well, we're alive, which can only be a positive, hey?

The feral Aspie teen has chosen to name his voices The Unholy Chorus (like a former patient of mine did) - he couldn't think of anything himself and I suggested it might help him learn to pick differences between his beloved parents nagging at talking to him and The Unholy Chorus calling him names (see? BIG difference to you and I, him not so much). NFI if it'll work but it's worth a try to at least get him knowing that they are from different sources.

The grass is growing like mad (hiding the dog's 'land mines', curses!) what with all the torrential downpours and Darwin humidity that's shifted south.
The same humidity 'they' can't seem to stop comparing with all places north of the Equator on a daily basis as well as claiming 'they' have proof these wild weather patterns are caused by climate change.
Thanks for that.
We'd have never noticed on our own.
*rolls eyes* 
Have been living on my Garden Salad Pizzas, which I'll blog the recipe for in another post; perfect for hot summer days, doesn't heat up the house, and super yum.
*drool*
We have a lone frog croaking in our backyard.
*Not so drool-worthy but cute*
South-east Melbourne suburb and we've got a mature tadpole that took a wrong turn somewhere.
This may or may not have been assisted by the inflatable wading pool that his been left out since last being graced by the flood-causing lardy butt.
And the squillion of mozzies.
And the humidity.
Along with the little drop tail lizards, ginormous caterpillers, a bajillion Rainbow Lorikeets, the odd Grass Parrot, swarms of Praying Mantis' (who seem to have an unhealthy fascination with Hubby *snort*), monstrously huge spiders who think they can scare us feeble humans with a glance (I, for one, won't disabuse them of this notion!) , squadrons of Dragon Flies zipping about madly at dusk as they gobble the damn mozzies, native bees who refuse to be herded into anything resembling a honey-producing box, humidity making everything including my delectable 12 seed bread go mouldy as fast as A Certain Spin Bowler can sms,  a mango seed that has roots/stems/leaves and looks set to take over the world while it's mates the avocado seeds are sending out scout parties to check for intelligent life forms.
They'll be gone a looooong time....
So, how's the humidity serenity...?

Calm sailing in aisle 4....Aisle 4, calm sailing...thank you

Well, having vomited my brain-fartage upon you in my previous post today I'll play it light and dreamy.
No, I'm not on drugs or drinking bucketloads of grog (at this present moment in time) but things are....calm.
The Tourette's vocal tics have kicked back in; they're always there it's just he's using them as more of an outlet to let loose some of his steam and to give us fair warning that he's anxious.
Not that he hasn't been told to verbalise these things but when he gets highly anxious commands, simple steps, rules of behaviour, etc, all fly out the window and he runs on gut instinct.
So, he's grunting a lot, his father has bought him a shedload of bubble wrap in rolls which he both sits and maniacally pops with glee and in turns uses it to belt us with.
It's true...bubblewrap really is (almost) as good as therapy with a shrink.
Think of those soft nerf balls and that's what it's like being hit with.
Sure beats having the crap belted out of you with a fist, foot or any piece of furniture lying close at hand.
Anyway!
He's off to his lapidary club, for his 3rd year, where he learns lapidary and all about geology and geography, minerals, gems and how to make an ice cream bucket of opal/garnet/greenstone/semi-precious gemstone bits into something close to any woman's heart.
Oh, and he's started on his Spanish.
He of the silver tongue will be able to woo any girl that crosses his path!
Things are in progress to get something done - don't want to say anything just yet in case I mozz it all, but we are being heard :)

Swearing...and crap...and shitty stuff...see? Swearing. I told you so.

Here I am...again.
No, trying desperately for some jocularity but failing miserably.
So, I mightn't.
Try, that is.
It's worse prattling crap that is no where close to being funny.
So you just get the crap.
2 hospital visits, one on Sunday the other today.
Police were involved, too, with capsicum spray at the ready.
Again.
One thing different...knives were involved today.
Knives that have lived on a magnetic strip screwed to the kitchen wall for years HIGH up above our heads and the trusty Stanley knife in the shed.
Until Aspie teen had his growth spurt and is just taller than me.
Kitchen knives now locked in ugly orange toolbox, with an ugly padlock, tucked away out of sight under the kitchen bench.
No injuries, no skin broken, no blood happened...but only because his father scared him into dropping the first one and wrestled the second one off him.
Numb.
I feel numb...not so much as when someone dies but like everything is at a distance, like the old proverbial of looking at life through the bottom of a bottle.
Or...something.
Cos, apart from the knives, he's hearing voices.
Has been for ages.
But good old Denial is more than a river in Egypt and if you keep denying it those voices might disappear.
Yeah, when pigs fly backwards to the moon on Sundays for fresh fish from China.
Is he psychotic?
Probably, going by the behaviour and paranoid claims we've had thrown at us (along with the claw hammer, shoes, utensils, etc).
Is it schizophrenia?
Is it anxiety?
Is it the full moon turning blue in the 3rd house of Saturn when Taurus passes through the 2nd quarter?
Who freaking knows.
All I know is that those on the Autistic Spectrum do have the potential to start waltzing up close and personal with a mental illness, of any sort, variety and style.
Gotta love mental illness, it's an equal opportunity bullshit artist c**t.

World Autism Awareness Day April 2, 2011

If you're in Melbourne please come along.
If you're not - please feel free to Tweet this event far and wide as VERY LITTLE media coverage was given to it last year.
Aspie teen LOVED the walk the last year and we'll be going along again this year.



Are you interested in volunteering for a fun-filled day to raise awareness
of Autism Spectrum Disorders?

On Saturday 2nd April 2011, Autism Victoria will be celebrating World
Autism Awareness Day to raise awareness of Autism Spectrum Disorders.
Following the success of our Autism Awareness March to the State Library
last year, we are now taking to the streets again and ask all our Autism
Victoria members and eSpectrum subscribers to come along and support this
event (and bring your friends and family!). This year we will be marching
along St Kilda Esplanade to the Beachcomber Cafe in St Kilda where we will
release 3000 multi-coloured balloons at St Kilda Beach.

Autism Victoria is seeking volunteers to assist with the walk and the 3000
balloon release on this day.

Tasks include:
* Assisting with the organisation of the formal assembly area
* Helping families and individuals congregate in the one main area
* Handing out balloons
* Helping families/individuals/children to complete the walk
* Ushering attendees
* Maintaining road safety
* Crowd control
* Maintaining a clean and tidy area

If you are interested in volunteering and would like to dedicate your time
to help make this a successful and exciting event on Saturday 2nd April,
please contact Stacey Aroutzidis via email at
stacey.aroutzidis@autismvictoria.org.au with your name and contact
details for further communication.

Kickin' out the bulltish, cos life's too short for someone else's bulltish

It's been 1 week since Aspie teen had his appointment with the neurologist - which means it's been a whole week without a meltdown.
No over-riding anxiety, no panic attacks, no rage attacks, no fretting, no worry.
Nothing except my beautiful Aspie communicating with us.

He had a very minor moment when hubby and I were having a quiet disagreement over something trivial. He spoke to us - not screaming, not yelling, not smashing the house up but SPOKE to us - that

"Parents always have to agree, you're not supposed to have disagreements, all parents get along and don't disagree. People all have to get along, we shouldn't have disagreements cos that is wrong."

Umm.....how about, no?
When hubby and I explained to him that it would be a pretty bloody boring world if everyone was in complete agreement all the time he FINALLY told us the Ed Dept employed worker who was supposed to be teaching him social behaviour in his lunch hour at school was, in fact, indoctrinating him into some fairytale bulltish world, telling him mummies and daddies, and people in general, never, ever, ever disagree.
Which has merely fed his increasing anxiety over the years because once he's told something never, ever,ever happenes, It.Is.Carved.In.Stone.

But when it does happen...as it usually does.....it's off the Richter scale of WRONG for him, triggering anxiety, meltdowns, etc, as it's going against what he believes is right, it's out of his control therefore the fight-flight-or-freeze response kicks in...in his case it's usually the fight response.
Putting the finger on what causes this reaction has been difficult as not even Aspie teen has been able to verbalise or identify - until now - what the trigger is.

But this time....THIS time, we bested that beast and knocked it on the head!
Since then he's come to me and asked about things, checking if his behaviour is correct, if his understanding of particular social situations is on the ball or did he misread it.
In other words, the fight or flight response is (shhhhh, quietly now) perhaps....gone.